I've crippled myself

[filthgoblin]

Seriously. I hurt from the ribs downwards. I am walking with a very pronounced limp. I am finding it very difficult to ascend and descend stairs and, without wishing to give you mental pictures you don't need, I'm finding getting on the loo to pee harder than I did after knee surgery. If this is how shit I am at exercise, I'm not sure I want any part of it. What a fucking mess.

In other news, I had my inaugural trip to the Hay Literary Festival tonight. I don't know what I was expecting, but what I got was triple-distilled middle classes in a tiny field. I know that I really am middle class, but that didn't feel like me at all.

The reason for going, though, was to see Dylan Moran. He was excellent, very funny and so good with the crowd. My favourite line of the night was "I love it when she says 'I know what you're thinking'. Of course she knows what I'm thinking. Everyone knows what I'm thinking. I want to be face-down in a cushion, with my mouth full of chocolate, and something lovely happening to my lower half..."

Amen to that, Dylan :D