I've crippled myself

Seriously. I hurt from the ribs downwards. I am walking with a very pronounced limp. I am finding it very difficult to ascend and descend stairs and, without wishing to give you mental pictures you don't need, I'm finding getting on the loo to pee harder than I did after knee surgery. If this is how shit I am at exercise, I'm not sure I want any part of it. What a fucking mess.

In other news, I had my inaugural trip to the Hay Literary Festival tonight. I don't know what I was expecting, but what I got was triple-distilled middle classes in a tiny field. I know that I really am middle class, but that didn't feel like me at all.

The reason for going, though, was to see Dylan Moran. He was excellent, very funny and so good with the crowd. My favourite line of the night was "I love it when she says 'I know what you're thinking'. Of course she knows what I'm thinking. Everyone knows what I'm thinking. I want to be face-down in a cushion, with my mouth full of chocolate, and something lovely happening to my lower half..."

Amen to that, Dylan :D

A different kind of excitement

I've been almost entirely consumed with lust enthusiasm for my fantastic new fandom obsession to the point of forgetting to eat and sleep and stuff and I feel I need to re-focus on real life excitement for a moment. And that excitement comes in the form of the fact that in three weeks and six days I will be arriving at Worthy Farm in Somerset for... The Glastonbury Festival!

The line-up came out on Monday, and I've now had time to consider it properly. There are going to be some hard choices, but I am very much looking forward to the following people, in some kind of roundabout order of importance:

Blur *squees until giddy*
Spinal Tap
Maximo Park
Jarvis Cocker
Beardyman
Mr Scruff
Fleet Foxes
Tom Jones
Tony Christie
Breakfast with Howard Marks
Metric
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds [although I know that if I give in and go see him again, I will end up wanting to fuck him senseless even though I know it's WRONG, goddamnit!]

There are hundreds and hundreds more here and if anyone sees someone they know is good and wants to make a recommendation then put it out there.